Why you should NEVER

April 10, 2018

give up your firearms my Minions! A perfect example just happened a quarter block South of the Bomber, a car accident. Now you may be thinking “What the fuck does that have to with guns, Burgernazi?” I will tell you what, It was IN FRONT OF the fucking SHERIFF SUBSTATION!!!!!!!! So what you ask? I will tell you so what: response time was 18 minutes! Think they will be any better for a home invader taking your shit and raping your dog? Maybe but I’m not willing to take that chance, nor should you. Hell, when the “officer down” call was made, down here six years ago, it still took the first responder over two minutes to arrive! I was in the parking lot kicking the perp’s ass, the guy would have gotten away in that time. Still feel safe putting ALL of your eggs in the governments hands? And then after I had already done all the heavy lifting the response was overwhelming (and wasteful since I had him cuffed already) but late. So I have given you two examples from my personal experiences, one faster than the other but both too late to have made a difference. And don’t take this as critical towards our Blue, there are only so many of them and you should remember that, but that makes the first responder YOU when the shit hits the fan. I keep jumper cables in my truck but only have to use them a couple of times a year. Guns, like jumper cables, are just tools: you don’t need them often but your fucked if you don’t have them in time of need.
Now on to lighter stuff. I have added bacon chipolte ranch pasta salad to the menu with great reviews. I will bring back chili when some meaningful football is back!
I am the Burgernazi and I approve this message.
P.S. I know this one wasn’t as funny as most, but reality pecker slapped me right in front of the building and gave me some inspiration.

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